Don't worry. There won't be a Tsunami In Cardiff Bay

by john of gwent

I thought I would cut and paste an article I have just put on my own blog.

Hot off the press from the BBC News Wales Website is the news that this man who will, they say, later today, kick off the Large Hadron Collider, has promised there will be no Tsunami in Cardiff Bay this morning. Or this afternoon.

Hmmm.

As a raw recruit to the ranks of the scientific profession, with the ink still wet on the piece of paper headed "Universitas Cambrensis" granting me "Baccalaureus Im Scientia Magna Cum Laude" I recall picking up a copy of The Sun from the tea room. Yes, we had the printed word in those days. On the front page was a Sun style enlargement of a very grainy greyscale photograph. A prototype of the sort of photograph now handed round offices across the country by grinning mums-to-be. And underneath that, in typical "Soaraway Sun 48 Point Type" were three little words :-

"IT'S A BOY"

About a fortnight later LOUISE BROWN was born.

You have no idea how much I hope that the stories peddled over the past few days by the successors of those journalists who couldn't tell an umbilical cord from a penis are equally flawed.

But if you'll excuse me, I'm off to prepare to kiss my arse goodnight. Because the chap above is absolutely right. There will be no tsunami in Cardiff Bay, because if it does go horribly wrong all the earth's seawater will fall through the event horizon (!) And remember folks, dive in head first. That way the last thing that will go through your mind will be YOUR arsehole. Jump in feet first and the last thing that will go through your mind is thje arse of some like-minded stranger.

But I leave you today with the following two rather pleasant thoughts.

First, if everything does turn to shit later today, the EU commissioners will go down the black hole into non-existence a few millionths of a second before we do. So the BNP will have delivered on their policy. An independent Britain will stand proud and free of the EU. Briefly.But second, and better than that, we die knowing Alistair Darling won't get a sodding penny in inheritance tax.

Ok people. It has been a pleasure and a privilege blogging for you. I am going outside now, to work. I may be gone for some time. On the other hand I may be back. Who knows.