Thursday, 13 August 2009

EU Financial Trade and Commerce Plc.

“It is easy to tell if you are losing a war. The other side succeeds in invading you, killing you, taking your territory, imposing their religion and culture upon you, raping your women, and most importantly, seizing control of the political apparatus to advance their cause whilst denying resistance.” – Paul Weston

By Albion

We are an old established company first founded in 1972. We specialise in the purchase of European Countries. We also deal in futures; that is, the futures of the people and their tangible assets that comprise the populations of the countries in our ever-growing portfolio.

At present our portfolio comprises 27 European countries. Our financial base is secure. It is guaranteed by the European banks and generously funded by the taxpayers of the principle governments who have signed up to the Lisbon Treaty.

The population of two countries, France and Holland, found some aspects of our company’s constitution questionable after discovering it took precedent over their own constitutions. Hopefully, hastily renaming the EU Draft Constitution as the Lisbon Treaty will negate any concerns they may have had.

Our long term commitment is to eventually extend our holdings to include countries such as Turkey and the regions of North Africa and Arabia.

We are at present in delicate negotiations with the Labour Government in London for the purchase of Great Britain; the details of our offer are confidential as is the P.O.A. There are some difficulties arising with on-going talks with London because of external pressure on their government to hold a referendum on the acquisition of its country.

The Brown Labour Government have assured us unequivocally any referendum that might be held will be a referendum on our constitution and not on a complete on a complete rejection of incorporation into our company.

The negotiations are preceding well and we do not expect any problems in future talks with London. Negotiations are made easier and smoother when dealing with London with the lobbying of Pro EU influential British politicians like Lord Mandelson, Mr. John Cameron and Mr. David Miliband.

I am sure you are aware at the same time we are currently in negotiations with Dublin for the purchase of Southern Ireland. Currently we have been presented with some minor difficulties concerning the finer points of the contract concerning putting to rest their obsession with neutrality and family planning. Hopefully these difficulties will be ironed out within the next few months when the people are once again sent back to the polls hopefully this time returning a yes vote.

Norway can be likened to a nervous bride on her wedding night. Despite two failed attempts by referendum to enter the European Community in 1972 and the European Union in 1994, the question of whether or not Norway should once again apply for EU membership has been regularly raised in the past few years in the national Norwegian policy debate. This, however, is not going to have any practical consequences in the immediate future.

We cannot bring you a complete breakdown of the revenue of the combined total assets of the principal countries in
our portfolio other than to say that their oil, gas, gold, fishing stocks, agricultural industries etc makes being part of our company a rock solid investment particularly at these volatile times.

EU Financial Trade and Commerce are also aware that the on-going negotiations on the purchase of Turkey appear to be causing unnecessary concern. The concern being that Turkey’s 72 million inhabitants being of the third world might swamp the European countries whose people make up the First world.

Our Demographers in Brussels have assured us and other countries heads of government that 72 million Muslims spread over 27 European countries would scarcely be noticeable.

Our accountants at the European Union Inc. will be pleased to send you a prospectus on request. Thank you for your interest.

EU Financial Trade and Commerce inc.

All enquires to EUssr@we